ponderings

Its late and I can't go to sleep. It's my fault because I ate too much delicious chocolate too close to bedtime. The Europeans definitely know how to make chocolate :) So, here I am wide awake and thinking about all that awaits us...so many thoughts and emotions since arriving to the ship three weeks ago.  I'd thought I'd take this opportunity to put them into words, since this blog is not only a way for us to share photos, but also to share from our hearts...like what God is teaching and showing us, and the joys and struggles throughout our journey over the next two years.

I must admit its harder for me than Tim to comprehend that this is home for the next TWO YEARS.  Not in a bad way really, just so completely different than our 1800 sq ft home that was our very own. Its more like a huge community constantly around us, working and living with the same people. We find ourselves with so much TIME on our hands!  No commuting to work anymore or spending time driving from here to there for whatever reason. Days off are free of grocery shopping and cleaning house.  All our meals are cooked for us. We literally can get up and walk down or up the stairs to work within 5 minutes! I'm in the middle of my fifth book :) I do realize, though, that things will look a whole lot different once we reach Africa and begin the outreach...busy times await us. I also recognize the blessing and the unique environment this is, and really desire to take advantage of the extra time...particularly spend more time with the Lord and memorize Scripture, two things I struggle with.  I also love how we are surrounded by people from all over the world and the cultural diversity.

God is also continuing to give me more of a heart and love for the people of Africa.  I can't wait to get there...just be there among the people.  I look forward to learning more about who they are, their culture and homeland.  I miss being a nurse.  I miss caring for my patients. I can't wait to hold their hand, to laugh with them, to connect with them...to do and be what I love again. I'm excited to see what God is going to do...through me...in me.  To share His love; to share who He is and what He's done.  To witness His power, and His faithfulness in a whole new way. The lives that will be changed.  How Tim and I will grow together, and what we will share.  

Then, I find my humaness-self thinking about what we've left behind or missing who we left behind, and even what we will do after the next two years (so ridiculous in a way)!!  This is where I so appreciate my laidback, in-the-present husband who balances me out. Yet, deep down I want to make the most of this time. Then, simultaneously, I am reminded of how God so clearly brought us here and His provision...of how it just feels so right here--my heart so at peace...of His faithfulness over all the years...of His perfect timing.  I'm amazed that He allows us to serve Him in this way despite our selfishness and inadequacies.  

Lord, we are not worthy...I pray you alone are glorified in this ministry...this journey you have us on.